basketball4life's+writing

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__LEGENDS BRAINSTORM CHARACTERS__ a man, a genie, and a bartender

__IDIOMS__ pedal to the metal

__MORAL__ if you have something cool don't tell until you lose it.

__final legend__

One day there was a lonesome man in a dull brown house. He was running his daily morning, Going to get he saw a the most a amazing thing. A genie, a real big, floating in the air, green genie. He looked worried. Then the genies worries became his own. The genie was being chased. He was being chased by a crowd. It was huge! Pitchforks and guns everywhere. The mans reflexes took over himself as he hit the pedal to the medal as he tackled the genie behind the bush. "Are you okay" the man panted.

"I gave the wrong man a wish and then the town got mad at me! He wished for royalness so I granted it to him and he started to take-over the town. Before he died he told everyone that I'm the next king. The town doesn't like that idea so they decided to make me die so they don't have to repeat the "kings" wrath," responded the genie as he watched the crowed stupidly run by. The genie was so pleased by his saving he granted the man three wishes. The man accepted in pride. "they will be found on a three-leaf plant I call a clover. Make a wish and pluck off a leaf and it will come true."

When the genie left, the man was thinking about all he could get with his wishes. A friend, a better house three more wishes, The man thought happily. After the happy thoughts were over he decided to go to the bar and buy beers on the house for everyone to celebrate. Drunk at the bar he told the bar tender about his wishes. Deviously, the bar tender grinned, took out a two-caliber pistol and shot the man to the ground. As the other costumers stared in agony the bar tender left the bar, with the the costumers, the lonesome man, and everything.

The bartender triumphlitly left the to go find this clover he searched the whole day. He searched the upstairs and the downstairs. Leaving empty-handed the bartender left the lonely home. The next day it rained. It rained everywhere, hard! it rained all over the clover and it produced more and more clovers. As they grew the one clover had to give out his wishes and they became only luck.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ Hi Jordan I heard in your story that the Genie only gave him three wishes because he saved his life. And the three leaf clover that he has to pull a leaf off of to get a wish and how the more the four leaf clover grows the more important they were. Oh and I really like how you used big words and good details like the bartender grinned evilly. You might want to tell the name of the boy that helped the Genie. Good Bye Jordan!!!!!!!!!! from Kylie

meyerislandchief writes: check your spelling and grammar add more adjectives & adverbs (describing words) break your dialog down into smaller paragraphs everytime a new speaker starts talking I'm not sure the bar & beer is appropriate for what we're trying to do, change the venue to a resturaunt or something like that Too much violence - no guns and shooting peeps, sorry Dear Jordan I heared that you wernt aloud to use a gun. I liked that you use a genie because there use then in the cartoons. I wondered that what happend with his luck in the first part? from Federico ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

original legend One day a man woke up and he went outside to get the mail. He looked up and couldn't believe his eyes. A real genie! floating in the air but there was a small crowd after him. no, a big one, a HUGE one! They had guns and pitchforks. The genie looked scared. I had the pedal to the medal as I tackled him into a bush. I couldn't believe it. I was caught red handed with a real genie! "Are you okay" I asked steadily. "yeah" he panted "I gave the wrong man a wish and the town got mad at me" he continued as he watched the crowd of people stupidly run by. "Hey you saved my life how about three wishes "okay!" the man said happily.

"The wishes will be here in this bush tomarow. There will be a three leaf plant i call a clover. As you make a wish pluck off a leaf and your wish will come true." The genie muttered. the next day the man went to a bar and had a couple beers. Drunk, he told the bartender about the treasure. The bartender grinned evilly as he took out a pistol and shot the man to the ground.

The next day bartender went to the mans house in search the clover. He looked in the upstairs and downstairs and all through the mans home. Leaving empty-handed the bartender left the lonely home. The next day it rained and more and more clovers grew. but as they grew the wishes in them spreaded out to the other clovers and now there just luck. Something the man never had. +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ hey Jordan the writing was great ...but make sure you check you comas and upper case letters. also check the spelling & gramer. see ya later,Jeff!_! +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++ hay its arch984, I liked the story a lot,but the only problem was spell check.See you later}<>!